At the age of seven, I lived with my grandmother, a respected community leader and devout Muslim. We lived in a big family house with about fifteen other siblings. We lived among people who practiced Christianity, Islam, and traditional religions and those who identified with no faith. Even though I was not practicing the Islamic faith with my grandmother, every morning during prayer, she sent me to the mosque to give money to support the people who were in need. I learned to honor people and respect religious diversity by watching my grandmother model those virtues through her interactions. I still remember one of her favorite Yoruba adages she uses daily. It reads, "Eniti a se lore ti ko dupe, o dabi olosa to ko ni leru lo" (Translation: If you show kindness to someone or give a gift to someone and the person does not appreciate the gift, it's as if an armed bandit has just robbed you). My grandmother was a selfless giver who raised many kids who were not her biological children or grandchildren. She taught me always to appreciate any act of kindness, no matter how seemingly insignificant.

When I became an adult, I realized many people in my tribe also use some expressions whenever they give a gift to someone or extend an act of kindness, and the person is trying to appreciate or show gratitude. They will say, "Ko to pe, a ki dupe ara eni" (Meaning: "It's no big deal," "Don't mention," "you don't have to say thank you to your family"). (FYI: Yoruba is a language spoken in West Africa, primarily in Southwestern and Central Nigeria. It's hard for me to translate to reflect the meaning deeply, but those expressions by many people sound like you don't always have to show gratitude.)

After reflecting on all these, I decided to stick to my grandmother's gratitude practice by saying thank you for any act of kindness extended to me as much as possible.

Here is a challenge to you and me: send gratitude texts or write gratitude letters to at least three people this week to appreciate an act of kindness.

Chaplain Samson King, M.Div.

Image Source:

https://guardian.ng/art/heart-of-gratitude-reinforces-benefits-of-appreciation/

https://www.africandrumming.com.au/product/talking-drum-yoruba-gangan/

LESSONS IN LEADERSHIP

With Dr. Kristina Johnson, THE OSU President

It was an honor to represent the Pastoral and Spiritual Care Department of THE Ohio State University yesterday during the Summer 2022 Commencement ceremony. I gave the invocational prayer for the event—a colorful and awe-inspiring moment.

Two of the greatest lessons I observed were humility and gratitude. While we all lined up behind President Johnson (waiting for the order to walk in), she did something spectacular. She left that front row and walked through the entire lineup, fist-bumping each person. When she got to me, I introduced myself as Chaplain Samson King, and she looked me in the eyes and said, "I want you to know I deeply appreciate the work you guys are doing. Thank You!" I told her I had read quite a few about her accomplishments and appreciated her commitment to the institution. I asked if she won't mind having a picture with me after the event, and she responded, "it will be my pleasure!"

After the event, everyone was in a hurry, and Dr. Johnson had already removed some of her regalia accessories. I walked up to her to ask again if she would like us to take a picture together. "Absolutely! Let me put all these things back on!" The rest is history. 

Shout out to my department for the trust to represent the team at that memorable and accomplishments celebration event.

Summary of My Story

• No matter your level in leadership, be humble
• Learn to appreciate the people in your team - money is not everything; just a fist bump can make someone's day.

Note: "A fist bump (also known as a bro fist or power five) is a gesture similar in meaning to a handshake or high five. A fist bump can also be a symbol of giving respect or approval, as well as companionship between two people." (Wikipedia)

With Dr. Melissa Gilliam, THE OSU Provost

PHYSICAL THERAPY COMPLETED! Grateful to Be Alive!!!

My Story

A little over two months ago, exactly four days to our daughter's High school graduation, I was driving back home from work around 4:30 pm and a few minutes away from my house. Before I knew it, I rear-ended another vehicle at about 60mph on the freeway. I never knew an accident had occurred ahead; they had blocked the exit, and I did not pay close attention to the traffic build-up.

My car was totaled, but mercy saved the other driver and me! I came out of the car and walked toward the other driver to ensure she was ok. I told her I was profoundly sorry but thankful she was ok.

I am grateful to my community- my colleagues at the OSU Pastoral Care Department for their support. Special thanks to Chaplain Cathy Disher for giving the necessary information for physical therapy and to Shelby York (PT) for her professionalism that helped with the whiplash. A massive shout out to the other drivers in my house (my wife and daughter) for enduring the task of driving me sometimes during those periods in addition to Uber trips.

Thankfully, the car is replaced, and I am driving and happy to be back in the gym!

Summary of My Story.

• Be thankful for every moment.
• Be kind to people no matter what because you do not know their current stories unless they tell you.
• Be kind to yourself and STAY SAFE

  

  With the Therapist

  
  

  

  Therapy Session

  
  

  

  Therapy Session

  
  

  

  My Car

  
  

REFLECTING ON THIS THOUGHT BY Francis Spufford

“He cannot do anything deliberate now. The strain of his whole weight on his outstretched arms hurts too much. The pain fills him up, displaces thought, as much for him as it has for everyone else who has ever been stuck to one of these horrible contrivances, or for anyone else who dies in pain from any of the world’s grim arsenal of possibilities. And yet he goes on taking in. It is not what he does, it is what he is. He is all open door: to sorrow, suffering, guilt, despair, horror, everything that cannot be escaped, and he does not even try to escape it, he turns to meet it, and claims it all as his own. This is mine now, he is saying; and he embraces it with all that is left in him, each dark act, each dripping memory, as if it were something precious, as if it were itself the loved child tottering homeward on the road. But there is so much of it. So many injured children; so many locked rooms; so much lonely anger; so many bombs in public places; so much vicious zeal; so many bored teenagers at roadblocks; so many drunk girls at parties someone thought they could have a little fun with; so many jokes that go too far; so much ruining greed; so much sick ingenuity; so much burned skin. The world he claims, claims him. It burns and stings, it splinters and gouges, it locks him round and drags him down…

All day long, the next day, the city is quiet. The air above the city lacks the usual thousand little trails of smoke from cookfires. Hymns rise from the temple. Families are indoors. The soldiers are back in barracks. The Chief Priest grows hoarse with singing. The governor plays chess with his secretary and dictates letters. The free bread the temple distributed to the poor has gone stale by midday but tastes all right dipped in water or broth. Death has interrupted life only as much as it ever does. We die one at a time and disappear, but the life of the living continues. The earth turns. The sun makes its way towards the western horizon no slower or faster than it usually does.

Early Sunday morning, one of the friends comes back with rags and a jug of water, and a box of the grave spices that are supposed to cut down on the smell. She’s braced for the task. But when she comes to the grave she finds that the linen’s been thrown into the corner and the body is gone. Evidently, anonymous burial isn’t quite anonymous enough, after all. She sits outside in the sun. The insects have woken up, here at the edge of the desert, and a bee is nosing about in a lily-like silk thinly tucked over itself, but much more perishable. It won’t last long. She takes no notice of the feet that appear at the edge of her vision. That’s enough now, she thinks. That’s more than enough.

Don’t be afraid, says Yeshua. Far more can be mended than you know. She is weeping. The executee helps her to stand up.”

― Francis Spufford, Unapologetic: Why, Despite Everything, Christianity Can Still Make Surprising Emotional Sense

OPEN MY EYES TO SEE

As I stood one more time in the William Fryman Chapel at the Good Samaritan Hospital, within the final two hours of my clinical rotation at this memorable hospital, I looked again at the image that I have loved so much and beheld several times in the past 16 weeks. I saw something in the image that I have never paid attention to. 

Mind you, I have stood almost every Saturday in this chapel (first thing in the morning) to pray for all the patients, families, and staff before rounding, but I have never paid close attention to that image. I know the two obvious objects in it are that of Abraham and his son getting ready to offer a sacrifice unto God. I saw their commitment, their vulnerability, the struggle going on (possibly) in Abraham's mind that he was about to slaughter the same promised child that took forever to have. Don't even mention the emotions that run through Isaac as he surrendered to his old man who insisted God spoke to him to do this. 

But on my final day at this hospital (as a chaplain resident), I decided to take an intentional look at that image, and to my amazement, there are two other people in that image. You can call them whatever you like, my guess is those were the two young men that followed Abraham on that painful journey (Genesis 22:3-5). 

My point is, are there THINGS in your life (situation and circumstances) that need another INTENTIONAL look - second, third, fourth, or 50 more looks for you to see and understand and appreciate more. Okay, how about this? Are there PEOPLE in your life that you have been living with or relating with for years and you have been looking at them but you have not actually looked at them? Guess what, I am speaking to myself as I write this because I have looked at that image for four good months and only saw two people whereas there have been four. Would you pray for me and with me that God should open our eyes to see beyond the facade and increase our desire to see when we look. (05/03/2020@7p.m)

During my last week at this hospital, I had a brief (7mins) interview with the staff chaplains, Stephen Summers and Susan Janos, here is the link https://youtu.be/sTIhe_VXAJ4

REFLECTIONS FROM BBT's BOOK, HOLY ENVY

“Across all our differences, we come into the world more or less the same way, through the body of another human being. We breathe the same air and depend on the same earth for our sustenance. We all weep salty tears and bleed red blood. Though we find different things funny, we laugh (and sneeze) in amusing ways. Up to a certain age we are so curious about each other that someone has to teach us to fear each other. None of us is born with a belief system or a worldview. We acquire those from our elders, along with our DNA. This does not diminish the importance of our religion, but it does establish a certain priority. What we have most in common is not our religion but our humanity, which is recognizable across class, continent, and color – unless someone goes to a great pains to blind us to one another.” (p.76)

MY MUSINGS: BETTER TO USE "RESPONSES" INSTEAD OF "ANSWERS"

During one of my meetings with a group of Adults a few days ago, I discussed a topic on “Spirituality and Gratitude”. Towards the end of the meeting, I handed out a Gratitude worksheet that has these questions:

1. Write down a gratitude ritual you do now.

2. Write down an everyday privilege (blessing) you've noticed that you used to take for granted. 

3. Name someone you're grateful to have in your life and why.

4. Describe a way you've thanked someone or intend to thank someone.

Some of the participants volunteered to share what they put down and were very meaningful and helpful to all of us. After I dismissed the class, one of them said, "I never thought I will have something to thank you for because when they invited me for "Spirituality Group", I thought it's going to be just one of that religious stuff. But I enjoyed attending this meeting and I just wanted to say Thank You!" I appreciated him and everyone for participating.

As if that was it, then comes a learning moment for me: After everyone had left, he was still in the room. As I was about to step out, he said to me again, "I really want you to know that I appreciate the discussion on gratitude again. Just a suggestion for you," he continues, "I teach Creative Writing in one of the universities here in the State." Wow, I never knew a college professor was part of my audience thankfully. "When you were asking for volunteers to read what we put down for the gratitude worksheet questions, you said, 'who is willing to share his or her 'answers' with us?' Next time, it is better to use the word 'responses' instead of 'answers'. When you ask people for 'answers' in a meeting like that, it often suggests there are 'correct ones' and you are only interested in hearing those who are 'correct'. Something tells some people, 'i better not share mine because it might not be the correct 'answer'". He graciously explained. "Responses are personal and easy to respond to but answers are specific. You see whenever my students give me a wrong answer to a question, I don't tell them they are 'wrong' but use an expression like, 'you answer this incorrectly' and teach them how to answer correctly." He concluded.

I expressed my gratitude to him for his kind feedback about the class but much more for teaching me how to better communicate. I know English is not my major or first language but guess what, effective communication is a life-long art we all have to continue to master with all humility. I hope that helps someone. I can't wait to teach that class to another group of people!